Oh hey friends. Yesterday was a whole thing, wasn’t it? Is it obvious that I have zero control over the editorial calendar of the sites I contribute to?
Let’s pretend those were complimentary in a very “opposites attract” kind of way. Just go with it.
Anyway, I learned some things yesterday about the Big Internet. It can be overwhelmingly kind and supportive while simultaneously being overwhelmingly disagreeable (to put it nicely).
Having a piece run on Scary Mommy is very cool and feels very validating to a little ol’ blogger like myself. But I was not fully prepared for the Big Internet.
Next time I’ll be ready, because I’ll remember these 10 things:
- The very first comment might be mean. You will see comments on your post and think “hurray! This resonated with someone! I did it right” and then suddenly feel very misunderstood. Remember these two words: Vocal. Minority.
- You will question your post once people start to pick at it. In the immortal words of Taylor Swift: Shake it off!
- Don’t look at the Facebook comments. Just don’t. It’s a rabbit hole you don’t want to go down.
- You’re going to look at the Facebook comments. You’re a writer, and since you’re a writer words matter to you. Grab a cocktail.
- Make sure someone is nearby to cut you off at a 2 drink maximum.
- Circumvent the advice given in point 5 and instead make that person to help you turn comment reading into a drinking game: every time a commenter takes a jab at you, take a drink!
- Editors aren’t idiots. They get paid to select what gets put on their site. You were published for a reason.
- Want to know who doesn’t get paid? Commenters. This is why you should be thankful for the kind ones – they took time to praise your work – and let the others roll off your back. You don’t need to justify yourself to them. You just don’t.
- Before you submit, be sure you are telling YOUR truth. Your truth is all that matters. It makes the criticism easier to swallow when you know you’ve been fully honest.
- If all else fails, channel your inner Jen Hatmaker (this rule probably applies to a lot in life):
“Most readers are craving truth-tellers who don’t sanitize their words to avoid criticism. Be brave.”
Be brave, writers. Be. Brave.
And now for a moment of shameless self promotion:
Are you writing down the ridiculous things you say so you can link up with me next Monday (June 1) for Out of the Mouths of Moms (#ootmom). You KNOW you have said something crazy today. Here’s mine for the day:
“G, I need you to eat your dinner without making me pretend to taste test each bite first. I am not your cup-bearer”.
Please don’t leave me alone on this limb of saying the most ridiculous things. Start making notes, I can’t wait to read what you have to share!